“Oh, and I’ve fallen out with Sadie. Yes, I know I’ve fallen out with her before but this time I mean it.
What has she done? I’ll tell you what she’s done.
It was last Tuesday. No, it couldn’t have been Tuesday. I always have my hair done on a Tuesday.
No, it must have been Wednesday. Just before bingo. Yes, that was it. Well, I was sitting downstairs in the residents’ lounge when Sadie comes in.
“Over here, Sadie,” I call.
“Actually, I’d rather not if you don’t mind, Mona. I’ve got something to discuss with Ethel.
And off she goes and ignores me, and goes over to sit with Ethel and then they went into bingo together. I didn’t think she even liked Ethel that much. But it just goes to show you what a few years in this place will do.
So, anyway, I don’t really like bingo and I don’t go there very often. My eyes aren’t that great these days what with that Dracula degeneration the doctor told me I’ve got. But it was either that or sit on my tod.
But even so, I thought I’d have a go and try and manage the best I could. Well, I was busy crossing off numbers here and there when,all of a sudden, I figured I was one off a full house. I was just waiting for number 88 to come up when the bingo caller shouts out: “OK, folks, I’m looking for two fat ladies.” And Sadie, who unknown to me had just come over, and was looking over my shoulder, suddenly shouts out: “There’s one over here.”
Fat ladies? Well, I was that upset I stormed out. Fat! Admittedly I may have put on a pound or two since coming in here but, honestly, with all that stodge they give you in here, it’s really no wonder. It’s not as if Sadie’s any Twiggy herself.
Later on, I saw Sadie showing off a new turquoise scarf to the others which I guess must have been one of the bingo prizes. But as soon as I went over, she immediately put it back in her bag.
Anyway, I haven’t spoken to her since.
And today, it’s my birthday. And I haven’t had a card from her, not a daffodil, nothing.
And when you get to my age, birthdays are so important. I remember last year they all got a cake for me and cards and held a little party. This year: nothing. I bet that’s Sadie’s doing. She’s turned them all against me.
Anyway, I’ve avoided her the whole day, kept in my room, and barely left except for meals. And even then I managed to avoid her by taking my tray to sit with Doris. Not that Doris is that great company, deaf as a newt and that puddled…
What’s that you say? Happy birthday for tomorrow? Tomorrow? But today’s Thursday. Oh hang on, no it can’t be. I get my nails done on a Thursday and ….
Tomorrow? Well, I can’t sit here talking to you on the phone all day.
Now, where could she have gone? Sadie!”